Ice troubles

We got a sheet of ice overnight and our appointments are no longer going to happen today. I'm so disappointed... the doctor that got us in so quickly is SO hard to get into and each girl had 2 tests scheduled at the hospital this morning too. So that means a total of 6 different things that had to be canceled and will now need to be reschedule. If it had been snow I would have tried to make it but it's just too dangerous outside right now for me to take my three girls out. There are a lot of schools that have closed ... *sigh*

The nurse had called me on Tuesday and said that Dr. D wants to have each baby get an Upper GI and VSS done to check for any anatomical abnormalities along with checking for the aspiration. I'll have to wait for her to call me back and tell me when they can get the girls back in again...

The last two nights have been completely awful, a full out battle of just trying to get SOME sleep. They just cry and cry and cry... Kara threw up all over me the other night, I mean ALL OVER. I had a small pool of her milk contents sitting in my lap. It was in my hair, soaked through my shirt and poor thing, she looked miserable. The puking wouldn't bother me so much but the lack of sleep starts to get to you. Part of me couldn't wait to get to these appointments, to try and see if we could do something to help them. 4 hours patches of sleep? Try 1, maybe 2... and then hours and hours of crying. Not just them laying awake and talking but arching back screaming. And there are two of them! I told Tom last night that I was losing and that I needed help...

Then of course... Abby was a nightmare last night too (before bedtime) By six o'clock I had reached my limit. The babies had not given me a break at all, so even though I got a 2 hour nap from her I was exhausted before she woke up. Part of it was probably the weather and this storm coming in, seems like she always gets a little more crazy. She could also probably sense how stressed I was feeling at that point too. We might have to come up with some activities to do today considering we will probably be stuck home again all day. :(

Abby Story: Yesterday afternoon Abby ran off with the remote and I kept trying to coax her to show me what she did with it. So I got up and looked all over trying to find it. I finally noticed that whenever Abby took a step the channel changed! She had stuck the remote down into her pj's and it was in the 'footie' part of the pj's!

I had made cookies from the Toll House frozen packages. Well Abby loves her cookies and she found the wrapper in the trash (surprise surprise) and brought it to me. "Noooo cookies" she said holding open the empty package. Every so often I could hear her walking around the house going "Noooo cookies."

2 Abby stories for the price of one!

8 week checkup

Wow where to start. I just got back from Kiley & Kara's pediatrician's office. It was an interesting visit. The nice part about having an early appointment was that we got in pretty fast and the Dr was able to see them pretty quick.

Kiley: 9lb 13oz     21 inches
Kara: 9lb 12 oz    21 inches

They went from the 3rd percentile in weight to the 50th and from the 3rd percentile in height to the 30th percentile. So they are both growing great at least!

I talked to Dr. L about my concerns with the aspiration and reflux. I figured that at the very least I should get them checked out and give this all a try. Hopefully at least we can get a baseline with what is going on. I'm glad I did, he heard Kiley wheezing a bit. The nice thing is that he referred them both to Dr. D (the GI specialist that Abby saw earlier) and I didn't even have to bring it up!

The odd thing is that he wanted to order a VSS (Video Swallow Study) for Kiley.... and an UGI (upper GI) test for Kara... then use the results for both of the girls.... um what? Just because they have the same symptoms doesn't mean the same thing is going on with both of them! Strange... anyways I'm leaving it completely up to Dr. D and what they want to do. He was called away from the clinic for an emergency today so the nurse is going to try and find me a spot and get back to me later on when they can be seen. She told me to just keep watching them close and to call right away if one of them goes blue again... (yep got that part figured out just fine!)

But Kiley & Kara both got their shots... it was a little hard watching them both get poked and feeling unable to properly comfort them both. They've both had their Tylenol now and are resting comfortably in our arms as Abby naps downstairs. I need some lunch so I'll end this update here and be back later with more updates :)

Fog... ick

Kiley laughed for the first time today! It was the cutest thing ever. I was so excited and she was so happy her little head was flopping all over the place. They are both snuggled up in the bassinet right now, Kara has her arm tucked up next to her mouth (it escaped from the confines of the swaddle blanket, or straight jacket as we sometimes call it). But every so often we hear soft little sucking sounds as her lips collide with her fist. I could fall asleep to that sound EVERY night!

Tomorrow we go in bright and early to see their pediatrician. I have mixed feelings about it. I go back and forth on deciding how much to say, what to say... or really if I should just leave it alone all together and handle things on my own. There are days and moments when I think to myself that there is no way I can do this alone... and other times when I feel like things are ok and there is no use stirring up a bunch of doctor's appointments and tests and meds and the headache that goes along with all of that... I'll try and report what happens tomorrow.

Church today was very interesting. We slept in a little (because we were all exhausted) and when I say sleep in I mean 8am. Tom took a shower while I got both Kiley & Kara changed and dressed. I worked so hard at finding cute outfits to put them in (I like to show them off when I get a chance!) Tom got Abby ready while I got dressed (no time for a shower... sad) As we were getting ready to go... Abby is trying her hardest to take off all of her clothes while Tom is trying to get Kara into the carseat and somehow pursuade Abs to keep her clothes on. I grab Kiley... who has had a blowout in the last 5 minuets and now needs to be completely changed. I get her changed, Abby has at least a shirt and pants on... Tom announces that Kara has just managed to puke all over the inside of the carseat... It is now 19 minuets before church STARTS.

Somehow we manage to get all three kids loaded into the car, I stuff a few toys into the diaper bag, another spare outfit and some snacks for Abby. I leave the house without breakfast or my morning coffee ... it was just one of those mornings.

The drive to church wasn't much better. The fog was so thick it was like a blanket of white had been tucked around us. Things went pretty well until a small grey car pulled out in front of us with NO lights on... and driving at a slow speed of 30-40 mph. We very nearly avoided rear ending them. Thankfully Tom saw them quickly and avoided hitting them. I will never understand why people don't have their lights on in the fog!

Naptime & Bedtime has gotten a little difficult for Abby lately. She breaks my heart when she sobs for me when I leave her in her crib. I try to give her plenty of hugs and kisses and cuddles... telling her I love her and that I will see her in the morning. But hearing her cry out for me makes me want to run back and tell her that everything is ok and that I will never leave her. In all honesty I love my Abby so very very much... but there aren't many moments where I feel the need to 'rush to her rescue.' Perhaps it is because she is so strong (and strong willed) that she is off on her own and doesn't need me. This new 'stage' is confusing to me because the times where she wants me so badly are increasing.... while my time and arms are decreasing...

It's especially hard now that Kiley & Kara are getting more alert. I want to be able to carry them with me and play with them too. I can't wait until Abby can play with her sisters and not 'hurt them'. Where she doesn't have to be so careful with them.

Well Kiley & Kara are asleep... time for me to go to bed. I'm completely exhausted.

Abby story: We were driving in the car today and Abby was reading a book about these counting sheep. One of the sheep was dancing and had it's arms out in a familiar pose. Abby sees it and yells "TOUCHDOWN!"

Did I mention she loves football? :)

Human boomerang!

Well... I have a little time to post and so I'll try to catch everyone up on what is going on around here. My friend left this morning and the house feels a little more empty (strange considering it is at times very full!) It was fun to have her over. Last night we played board games when my friend Carrie came over to play. We laughed and laughed. It was the type of board game where you must do silly things to advance towards the finish line.

"Wah wah wah Wah wah wah...." <---- The sound Tom made as a human boomerang. I had to do the hula and there was plenty of awful singing. It was a great time even if Kiley & Kara cried through most of it. It got a little difficult when I wasn't allowed to use my hands or arms....

Kiley & Kara go in for their 2 month check up on Monday. I'm going to talk to the doctor about their reflux and I'm hoping he will refer me to the specialist that treated Abby's issues. I'm also 99% sure that they are aspirating. The other day when I was feeding Kiley she aspirated some into her lungs. She turned purple and couldn't breathe... it was a little scary!! They also seem to choke and cough a lot so I might need to have them get video swallows done... great...

I don't know how to feel about all of their issues. Some days I really don't think it's fair we have to deal with this all over again... though they do say it is hereditary. There is a good chance that they will have me go on the MSPI diet again (milk soy protein intolerance). Thankfully this time around I have a better idea about what I'm getting into ... and there is a group in my online community that has a lot of helpful information and resources. I won't feel so alone if I have to do it again, and hopefully I can prevent myself from starving this time...

And just in case you are wondering... I won't stop breastfeeding...  A) I don't trust formula B) Formula is far too expensive let alone if it has to be specialized and C) They are better off if I don't stop.

I guess we will find out more on Monday. I really hope that he doesn't try to handle it himself first. Last time it took him 6 months to decide it wasn't working. I know this stuff... he isn't qualified to handle it. And I have two this time... I can't handle 6 months of it... not with Abby too. On a positive note, Kara is really holding her head up now! They are beginning to smile and coo... they are growing stronger every day!

Abby has taken to screaching... I really really hope it isn't a long phase. We are all ready to pull our hair out... or go deaf. It's like she's discovered a whole new octave! gah! Yesterday we went on a walk. It was nice to get out even if it was a little chilly. I hope the weather doesn't get cold again! The -30's were tooooooo cold. Tom's Jeep is still in the shop and it is very frustrating. He made an appointment to have it seen on Wednesday and they haven't even looked at it yet. They told him to call again on Tuesday or Wednesday. It's been there since Monday! Do they realize that I'm stuck at home as long as they wait??? Grrrr

Well I had better get some laundry done and I need to take a look at my online classes again. If you feel like it, leave me comments :) As much as you love to read my blog I love to see that people are actually reading it and I love to see the comments :)

Preety Toes

"God never gives you more than you can handle... sometimes I just wish He wouldn't trust me so much." This quote from Mother Theresa has been bouncing around in my head quite a bit. There have just been a lot of things going on around here that are pretty stressful. At times I feel trapped, at times I wish that I could just go back with my nursing buddies, where I would be struggling to get through the final semester of nursing school. But it wasn't meant to be for me... not yet at least.

On to brighter things. My amazing, awesome college friend stole me away for one brilliant hour. She treated me to a pedicure and we got a chance to breeze through the mall a bit. It was so fun, I had a chance to just 'be' for awhile, to laugh and enjoy my friend. We bought Tom his belated Christmas present (an air popper for popcorn) got ice cream from Dairy Queen and headed back home.

When Abby saw my toes she got really excited. She kept petting them and touching the fingernail polish. She wanted preeties too so I painted them for her. It was really cute. She kept tip-toeing all over the place, touching them. She was so proud.

Abby hasn't had a bottle all day either, which doesn't bother me since Ive been wanting to transfer to the sippy cup... the fact that she will not drink any type of milk or formula is more something I'm wondering about. She's drinking water but I would still like to make sure that she is getting enough of the vitamins and fats that she needs nutritionally.

But Tom is here with Pizza... I'll be back later to write more on Kiley & Kara.... for now it's time to eat!

One.. Two... Three...

Abby enjoys bread. To her it is not only a snack... but a great medium for creativity. At least that is what I told myself after she demolished an entire loaf that she had snatched from the counter-top. I'm not sure why Tom and I both assumed that when we saw her eating a piece, that she would stop at one. When we turned around she had the entire loaf sprinkled around the house like Hansel and Gretel. At least someone invented a vacuum, it must have been the mother of a toddler.

Coffee is brewing and I'm feeding Kara. Tom is sitting with Abby watching Dinosaur Train. Abby's consumption of the formula has dropped significantly. Yesterday I don't think she finished a bottle. I'm not sure if her stomach is a little off or she just doesn't want it anymore. She did drink out of her sippy cup so at least she was drinking fluids. We are having streaking difficulties with this one too. Yesterday, everytime I would go in to change a baby or make lunch etc etc... I would see her streak like a bolt of very naked baby. It's January here, if we're lucky it's 30 degrees outside. The biggest challenge has been her naps. Twice lately we have gotten her up from her nap to find her naked from the waist down... no diaper and the bedding ends up in the wash. Usually then she is cold, wet and naked. Not a great start to our afternoon! I put a onesie on her yesterday afternoon and this seemed to work. Hopefully it will again today.

I haven't written a few days, things have been a little stressful around here. Kiley & Kara's reflux issues seem to be getting worse. I've been debating calling the doctors about it but so far haven't. They have their 2 month check up on Monday (I think) so I'll probably try and bring it up then. Kara will drink and arch her back and cry and then get back on, then get off, on, off, on, off... it's frustrating. Both girls are throwing up, projectile vomiting everywhere. Spitting up I can deal with, the constant puking where they are soaked, I'm soaked and the crib sheets or our bed sheets are soaked, that gets a little more frustrating. Then of course they are both angry because the milk has shot out their noses. It always surprises me that after puking like that the first thing they want to do is get back on and drink... something I'm not thrilled about.

With Abby I used a homeopathic med called Colic Calm, it helped more than the drugs did for Abby. I've been using it on Kiley & Kara with moderate success. The first night I got 4 hours of sleep in a row (amazing!) so I was excited to try it again. The next night they puked... several times after drinking it. So it didn't really help their tummies. I'm also wondering if the rashes that are covering their faces and that flare up once in awhile are eczema. I guess we'll find out more later.

They are both getting more and more alert. It is fun to see them look up at you and give you a baby smile that melts your heart. Every once in awhile we catch them cooing back and forth to one another. (I love this picture of them both passed out on our bed after I finally got them back to sleep)

My college friend is staying over with us for a few days. Abby enjoys hanging all over her. We might go out for an hour or two as she wants to take me somewhere without the kiddos. My mom said that she would watch them for a little while. My classes are starting this week and I'm feeling overwhelmed with them. Hopefully once I adjust to the extra work it will get easier. One of my professors wants us to buy a textbook that is impossible to find. I've had two other people help me look but all that I can figure out is that the book is out of print.... what? How do you teach a college class with a book like that? (It's a wellness class)

So.... if you feel up to it, keep us in your prayers this week as I juggle everything.

Oh and Abby counted to 10 yesterday.... "One, Two, Three, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten!" Notice anything? :)

3D!

At Last! A movie date with my husband. My wonderful mother offered to babysit the girls for an afternoon so that Tom and I could go out together. His boss had given us $50 towards Spezia (a restaurant) for a Christmas present so we decided we could eat lunch there and head for a movie.

For the second week in a row we made it to church this morning. I averaged... probably 5 hours of sleep last night out of the 11pm-8am evening hours. If our church started a little later it would have been easier to get there, 9am is for us... just hard. But we managed to both get showers, get all three girls changed and fed... myself a coffee and out the door by 8:45am.... The roads were a little icky but I was so excited to finally make it out of the house! It was fun to see the way the drifts have swallowed the houses around here. There was one drift that was probably 10 feet high! We were both actually able to sit through the whole church service. Abby did pretty well actually. We sat next to quite a few families with children and next to my aunt's family and I think that helped. I also packed along 2 little boxes of raisins that Abby enjoyed 'sloooowly' eating out of the box... and dumping them on the floor. Sadly, although we were able to stay in church and listen to the sermon, I wasn't able to hear much of what was being said. Some day! It was fun to talk to people after church again... and I was finally able to get the cookware that had been sent along with the meals that were given to us when the twins were born. One of the families lives right here in our town!

Today was the first time I had been away from the twins. It was really nice to get out and have a nice dinner without worrying about Abby throwing a fit or trying to run away... or the babies crying. It was even nicer to go see a movie! We saw Avatar in 3D, I wasn't sure it was really worth the 10 dollar tickets but since the last movie we saw in the big theaters was for our anniversary date in June... and our next date will probably be awhile... we broke down and spent the 21 dollars. During the beginning credits they asked for us to be 'green' and give back our glasses.... for 10 dollar tickets I was keeping my glasses!!!! (Abby had fun with them after we got home, so it was totally worth it!) The only thing we regretted was not getting there earlier because the theater was crammed with people and we ended up staring straight up at the screen. I really wasn't expecting the movie to still be so popular that you couldn't show up 20 minuets before and get a good seat. Oh well... we still had fun. It was interesting that some people brought their small children. The mother behind us kept having to read the subtitles to the kids... and there were some violent scenes that I wouldnt have wanted my girls to see... I hope the little girl doesn't have nightmares tonight!

But we both really enjoyed the movie, it was a lot of fun. The girls all did great and Kara & Kiley took the bottle with no troubles at all. My mom did say that Kara seems to have a little harder time handling the faster slow of the bottle (similar to how Abby was)... not that I am surprised at all. She also has the worse reflux of the two. But everything turned out to be just fine. I'm not sure what our plans are for tomorrow. I'm really hoping that the girls sleep fairly well tonight. I'm so tired my eyes are heavy and my body just aches. It was really hard to not want to just curl up and fall asleep in the dark theater.

Both babies are on their way to sleep so I should get to sleep while I can.... night!

Tales of Toe Munchers and Chunky Milk

I don't want to post solely on our night time battles. I will say that it wasn't any better... and it wasn't any worse. Perhaps with the exception that Abby added herself to the night time routine. We aren't really sure if she had a nightmare or if her teeth were bothering her.

My mom, sister & brother came over around 6:30pm, I'm honestly not sure how we survived until then. There was one minor 'breakdown' around 3pm and then we moved on. Kiley and Kara just wouldn't stop crying. I fed Kara, went to Kiley and fed her... Kara was already screaming so I fed her again... by now it had been almost 45 minuets of feeding (or more) and Abby was jealous and upset that I wasn't paying attention to her. So she started pulling things off of counter tops and creating mayhem. I will admit... there was a point where every single one of us was crying. I guess to look at things positively... thats only ever happened twice.

After the tear fest I decided that nothing I was going to do would help the babies. They were changed, fed, warm and swinging in their swings. So I poured myself another cup of coffee, added sugar, a little milk... thought I saw chunks. Great... yep. The milk was spoiled. Which might NOT have been so bad except that I had used it on my cereal and in my coffee earlier that day. Ugh... it's like eating pancakes and as you go back for seconds you find worms in the batter. (yes that happened to me when I was younger... couldn't eat pancakes for years) So I poured it out, made myself a fresh batch of coffee and Abby and I retired to the basement.

Where we played house. Abby likes her play area in the basement. She took a stocking hat, placed a wooden carrot and cucumber into her 'purse,' slung it over her shoulder and said... "Bye Baby!!" Then left her 'house.' She did a few things, climbed into the tunnel and we took care of her 'baby.' After about an hour of playing downstairs she seemed in a better mood. Bouncing on the bed will do that.

My sister stayed overnight and helped me by giving Abby a bath last night. Abby has a set of bath tub crayons... and wow it was all over! My sister said that Abby was trying to eat her toes... with her legs straight, so she showed her how to bend her knees so she could munch on her toes. We now have a full fledged toe muncher.... When I took a shower the remains of Abby's 'preeties' made me smile. Little reminders of Abby are everywhere!!! This set was cute though.

Well it's 10 am... probably should get the babies changed and get some breakfast. I think we will head down to my parent's place after Tom get's off work. We are all in need of a little scenery change. I'm glad I have someone else to help and play with Abby... it will make our day fly by!

Some Long Nights... And Long Days....

How did my night go?

9:30PM: Babies falling asleep, decided it was a good time to go to bed and maybe get a little more sleep. They had been really fussy and I was feeling really overwhelmed. The last few days were beginning to wear on me.

11:30PM: Kara is fast asleep....Kiley still not showing any signs of slowing down. She's wide awake and playing the 'Pacifier Game" where I put it in, she sucks, spits it out 3 minuets later and then cries for it to be put back in.

12:00AM: Kiley finally goes to sleep. I settle in.

1:15AM: Kara is up. Time to eat..... followed closely by her cranky sister.

3:30AM: They are finally back to sleep. Sorta.... I finally decide to let Kiley fuss herself back to sleep. I'm just too tired to play her games right now.

5:00AM: Kara is screaming. I start the feeding process again. Kiley wakes up about 5 minuets after Kara and demands to be fed. Tom ends up getting her out of the bassinet because she doesnt stop screaming. She actually falls back asleep in my lap while Kara is eating. I wake her up when Kara is done though because I want her to eat.

6:15AM: They are both finally almost back to sleep. I lay back down and ponder if it is even really worth laying back down and going to sleep... Then decide that even if they do get up in an hour and a half... I'll need that hour and a half to get through today.

And then we are up again at 8:00. Yes I'm feeding them again. The last 3 nights have been like this, with different babies playing the fussier roll. Take that and then have us stuck at home for three days in a row... with a very hyper Abby and maybe you can see why my batteries are just running low. They both need to be changed now too... Hopefully they didn't soil their outfits.

The funny thing is at 6AM I really wanted to make rolls for my Dad. He stayed the night with us again last night because of the weather and so brought us some very much needed groceries. THANK YOU (I made a roast last night for the 4 of us) But he had also brought these simple/easy to make Pillsbury Orange Glazed Cinnamon Rolls... Dad had a big meeting at work today and I soooo wanted to make him some rolls and coffee. If I had had more than say 3-4 hours of sleep at that point I would've done it. I wish I hadn't been so tired. It would have been fun to do.

I have no idea of our plans today. I doubt that we will be going anywhere once again. The high for today is -7... yes the high. I don't think it would be safe for us to travel in case we got stuck somewhere by myself. I'm not even sure what roads have been cleared. Yes we could get to the interstate but then where do we go?

Does anyone know at what point a rash on Kara's face should be something I get checked out? It's on her right, left cheeks, back of neck and chest the last I checked. I noticed it on Tuesday. I thought that if it was heat rash it wouldn't last long but don't have much experience with rashes.

Well I need to get going so that I can get a quick shower before Tom leaves and baby duties resume. I'm ok... just tired and needed a place to talk through some of my frustrations. God will give me the strength to make it through one more day (Though I wouldnt mind a little prayer for strength and peace this morning) I should get back into my coffee momma devo... if I could just remember where I hid it from Abby....

This is what keeps me going, even when they drive me a little nuts..

100th Post

Wow have I been posting that much? I have taken to this blogging thing and enjoy capturing the little moments during my days with the girls. I hope that you are enjoying it too :)

SO what have we been up to lately? Not much. We have been strictly homebound for the last two days. Yesterday Tom's Jeep died on the way to work... we aren't sure why as it was one of the warmer days in the last 2 weeks (10 degrees). So he took the van to work and we were stuck at home. It was an interesting day... Abby had her good moments and her not so good ones. Kara was very very fussy and cried most of the day. There were a few times that I couldn't console her and with 2 other children in the house needing my attention she got left to cry a few times. When the odds are 3 to 1 there isn't much you can do. Kiley probably got the least amount of attention because she was so sweet and sleepy...

I'm not sure what was bothering Kara, she threw up a few more times and wanted to just eat and eat and eat. Abby decided in the afternoon that she needed to scream. So the one time I called my mom she was screaming at the top of her lungs. There wasn't much to our conversation obviously. Around 6:30 I couldn't handle Abby any longer and both babies were screaming. So I asked her if she wanted a bath (usually my last trick). She played with her new bath toys... Kara was screaming, Kiley had given up after a few minuets and gone back to sleep... 15 minuets... Kara was still screaming so I told Abby I had to grab the baby quick. (She's really good with the water so I wasn't too worried about leaving her for a minuet)

Well in the 30 seconds that it took me to get into the nursery, grab Kara and get back... Abby had gotten OUT of the tub, grabbed a pink bath towel and brought it back into the tub with her.... I fed Kara in the bathroom as I watched Abby in the tub. Then Abby decided it was time to get out.

I was a little stressed by the time Tom got home to watch the Hawkeyes play. I took a bath and read a book after Abby went to bed. I needed the 'alone' time.

It doesn't look like I'll be getting out again today. There is a blizzard warning and temps are supposed to be very cold (-3 for a high) I'm not even sure if Tom will make it home tonight. He is making arrangements to stay in town if it is too bad. My Dad might be staying over at my house if he can't make it home. I guess we'll see what the night brings!Well Abby is digging things out of the drawers :P Time for me to run!