Sensory Processing Disorder and our House

First of all let me say, that I doubt that I've ever been more proud of Abby.

I know I touched a little on what we were starting to do these last few weeks but I thought I would write a little more in detail so that I could try and help people understand it a little better. First of all, I had never heard of this 'disorder' until a week ago. It's amazing what you learn... Here is a little information that I found fascinating if you are interested:

Sensory processing (sometimes called "sensory integration" or SI) is a term that refers to the way the nervous system receives messages from the senses and turns them into appropriate motor and behavioral responses. Whether you are biting into a hamburger, riding a bicycle, or reading a book, your successful completion of the activity requires processing sensation or "sensory integration."


Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD, formerly known as "sensory integration dysfunction") is a condition that exists when sensory signals don't get organized into appropriate responses. A person with SPD finds it difficult to process and act upon information received through the senses, which creates challenges in performing countless everyday tasks. Motor clumsiness, behavioral problems, anxiety, depression, school failure, and other impacts may result if the disorder is not treated effectively.


Symptoms of SPD, like those of most disorders, occur within a broad spectrum of severity. While most of us have occasional difficulties processing sensory information, for children and adults with SPD, these difficulties are chronic, and they disrupt everyday life.


Most children with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) are just as intelligent as their peers. Many are intellectually gifted. Their brains are simply wired differently. They need to be taught in ways that are adapted to how they process information, and they need leisure activities that suit their own sensory processing needs.


Another little kid wrote that this is what the disorder feels like: 


"Imagine driving a car that isn't working well. When you step on the gas the car sometimes lurches forward and sometimes doesn't respond. When you blow the horn it sounds blaring. The brakes sometimes slow the car, but not always. The blinkers work occasionally, the steering is erratic, and the speedometer is inaccurate. You are engaged in a constant struggle to keep the car on the road, and it is difficult to concentrate on anything else." 


I read this the other night and just cried... because I feel like this is something Abby has been dealing with since she was born. Can you imagine feeling like that all the time? They say that kids with this disorder often have EATING problems AND SLEEPING ISSUES when they are babies.... hmmm sounds familiar. These kids also tend to be very smart and have HIGH VOCABULARIES....


No wonder Abby sometimes feels out of control! I also learned that it is best if SPD is caught before the age of 7 because the nervous system is still malleable before than and before it affects school and friendships (because it does! These kids often get labeled ADHD and are put on meds even though the disorder is completely different) 


So this is what we are working on in Occupational Therapy every week:

Heavy work activities (i.e., proprioceptive input) are used for children with sensory processing difficulties to help increase attention, decrease defensiveness,  and modulate arousal.

If they are seeking out excessive proprioceptive input, they are looking for a way to calm and organize their nervous system. They may seem disruptive, full of excessive energy, or even unsafe. These are the crashers, jumpers, movers, and shakers! (Sound like Abby?)These are the children we ABSOLUTELY want to target with heavy work activities. It WILL make a difference in them!

So we learned a few more activities and I learned that I need to do a high work load activity every couple of hours to help her. Seriously... her occupational therapy is more of a workout than any 'work out program' I see a HUGE improvement with her, she follows directions, she isn't running around destroying my house, climbing on things, crashing into things, breaking things, yelling, screaming... 

I'm so excited that we finally are going to be able to help her! This will be a tough journey as most kids don't grow out of this. My biggest concern is what school will be like for her. But we will cross that bridge when we get there. For now we continue to do Play Therapy on Mondays and Occupational Therapy on Thursdays. Originally I was afraid of saying anything about all of this but I've decided there is nothing to be ashamed about and I don't care what people think. I'm getting my baby some much needed help and she is most important.

After all... I love her so much and I'm so proud of her...

Exhausted

March 1st: 4 Book Trailers Due: including pictures, audio, narration AND a book review due for each book including Lexile levels ... etc

March 5th: (you don't have to read this whole bit)

For this assignment, you will need to create a fiction or non-fiction movie that is engaging to supplement a academic lesson. You will need to buy a webkinz animal at your local store, register, and navigate to WebKinz studio. See the attached tutorial Powerpoint before getting started.
Your movie should use at least 11 of the 15 scenes, have an emotional hook, use the supplied music and be fun to watch.
You will submit to the dropbox a word or rtf document with an explanation of how you will be using this with  students. Also, attach the .wmv movie created using Windows Media Encoder of the movie. Having sound is better, but if you cannot get sound, that is okay. 
This assignment does involve buying a webkinz pet OR borrowing someone's account. Multiple people can share an account, just remember to have your movie saved as a .wmv file using windows media encoder before deleting your story. If you ask around, you may find an elementary school student willing to loan you their account. 
Assessment: Webkinz movie has a plot that supports something you would teach elementary students. File is correctly saved as .wmv, plays in Windows Media Player and is uploaded to the dropbox. 


FOUR DAYS... My professor gave me FOUR DAYS between large assignments! I'm sorry if you read through that... I didn't mean to stress you out too. I'm just sick, and exhausted and now I have to try and figure out this latest insane homework assignment for a class I despise.


PLUS


Abby sick x1 week now
Kiley: sick 2 days
Kara: sick 1 day
MYSELF: SICK SINCE SUNDAY




I'm having a hard week. I feel like crawling into bed, throwing the covers over my head and crying myself to sleep. At least until K or K wake up 


Time to get back to homework....

Sickies :(

Well... K&K are sleeping, Abby is playing with her toys and I'm lounging on the couch. Still feeling a little under the weather. Whatever this bug is it hit me hard! No fever and no puking so for that I should be thankful. I just have the general weak, achy, sore throat type. That is hard enough with 3 kids!

Cute Abby Story:
Abby was holding her play camera and held it up to her face. She said "Cheeese, Look at mommy!" Tom and I laughed and laughed. She has picked up on me fast!

So the big goings on around here... at least to me is the start up of my new hobby.... photography. Wow it has taken off fast! I was reading in my devotional the other week about how God encourages us to use our talents... and I just kept feeling this nudge either from people I know and love or just that feeling that I should be doing it more. I really really love capturing those smiles and creating something beautiful for parents. I just remember how disappointed I was in the photos of Abby that I had done at JC Pennies. The experience was awful, they didn't care... at all. And there was nothing special about it. I wanted pictures that people would go "wow... your daughter is beautiful!" The other problem is that it was so expensive! They suck you in with the "free sitting fee" then charge you per outfit, per package... then if you want anything special done with the photos they charge you for the 'premium package..." by the time we walked out of there I had spent 300 dollars and gotten a mediocre experience.

That is why I charge $50 for infant sessions. The parent gets to keep the cd of the images and order whatever they want. Plus... I think I do a few more original/artsy/creative shots... thats my opinion though. I want something people can be happy and proud of! It's not about me... it's about their baby... and remembering how special that time was.

Ok I'll get off of that... the whole thing has just been on my mind a lot!! I'm just soooo excited by it! It helps get me through the day sometimes when things are tough and the homework is crazy and I'm exhausted and worn out.

Kiley and Kara are talking up a storm now! They have both had blow outs in the last 24 hours. (I'm so happy Tom has been around to help!) The girls keep me busy but I'm falling more and more in love with them ... if that is possible. They try so hard to sit up on their own now and we have even tried them out a little in the rainforest bouncer. Abby is getting better and better about being gentle with them and playing with them. Her poor nose is still running like crazy and she just looks miserable sometimes. I hope that she gets over this bug soon!

Well I have some things I need to get done around the house, though in general I'm taking it easy. When the body says slow down, sometimes thats exactly what you need to do!

It's still cold outside...

Wow I know... long time no write. Things have just been busy busy busy around here. The more homework I have the less I feel like coming on here and thinking about how I should put the day down in words. Plus by the time I get K&K into bed there usually isn't much energy for anything else.

Abby hasn't been feeling very well these last few days. Her nose is running like crazy and tonight I could hear her coughing downstairs in her room. I hope she doesn't get too sick. Poor baby. I was just putting Kara back to sleep and she looked up at me and smiled as if to say "You can't go to bed yet mom!" but her little eyes were too heavy and she couldn't help but go back to sleep. Kiley is OUT. She was just screaming earlier (along with Kara) I think she wore herself out. I hate the wild hours. From about 6pm-10pm they are just Craaaaaaanky. Nothing makes them happy, it's hard but we make it through it. My sister is here tonight and I love having her over. I feel bad that tonight all we got to do was hold crying babies... but maybe tomorrow we can do something fun.

Ok so what are the girls up to:

Abby's corner:

Abs is busy busy as usual. We are actually going to see an Occupational Therapist (OT) Kristen. They think that she might have a harder time with her sensory processing. It probably stems back from all of the issues we had with her reflux and the aspirating and how much pain she was in from all of that. For you and I if we got hurt we have certain ways we deal with that pain. Abby on the other hand will do things like pull on her hair (or pull it out), grind her teeth or run into things. Something about the pressure helping her pain. We are just trying to redirect her from doing that. They said it also helps her to do things using her muscles. She had a great time playing in the 'gym' with Kristen. She loved lugging around these weighted balls. One weighed 2lbs and the other weighed 6! She carried them like it was no problem. (Now remember she only weighs 24lbs herself) Most kids wouldn't enjoy carrying around a 6lb ball and playing with it... for 20 minuets.  She really did a great job.

We will probably continue to do this for 8 weeks. By the end of those 8 weeks I should have plenty of activities that I can do with her at home to try and redirect her behavior into a more positive manner. We went to Walmart to buy a few of our own weighted balls that she could play with (wow they are hard to find). I asked one of the employees if what was on the shelf was all they had. He said that yes that was all they had for weighted balls but that that they also had these special dumbells (sp?). I said that they wouldn't work because the balls were actually for her. He gave me the strangest look! I bet he was wondering why I was putting my 2 year old on a weight lifting program!! :o) 

Kiley's corner:
She is starting to make more and more noises. She still has the more laid back personality and enjoys being held. Her favorite afternoon past time is taking a nap (which mom loves). She is getting stronger and can lift her head up for longer periods. The lump/bump on the back of her head is still really pronounced in my opinion. I think I will bring it up at her next appointment to make sure that this is ok....

Kara's corner:
Kara is a talker, and a smiler, and a really loud screamer. (sounds a bit like baby Abby) She is REALLY strong and is rolling all over. She tips over constantly when I put her on her stomach. It's as if she says "HAH! So much for this tummy time!" She is also a cat napper which is completely opposite of Kiley. Nap, Awake, Nap, Awake... yeessh! Makes it hard to get anything done....

Well my battery is dying and I'm thinking it's time for sleep. Hopefully I'll be back sonner next time! I need more pictures of Abby... but she's just so darn fast! And being sick doesnt make for a happy picture.... Hopefully soon...

Roar

I got up early to do homework so I know I really shouldn't be writing on here... but I wanted to jot down a few of the things that happened yesterday while I had the chance. (aka it's quite in here)

Our neighbor E invited me to a Bible study yesterday morning. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go as the thought of a Bible study with 3 young children seemed a bit overwhelming. But I decided to give it a go and if it didn't work out we just wouldn't go back. E actually came and picked us up in her van (somehow we got all 5 kids into it- since all of them were in carseats) The lady's house was only about a mile away so it wasn't far. There was another little mom there with her little boy who was 18 months old. He was a little more shy and I think Abby was a bit overwhelming for him at first. It was really nice that she had someone her age there to play with though! She is also expecting at the end of August so between E's 2 boys and baby girl and my Abby and 2 babies there were 7 young children there. It was a hectic Bible study but honestly... there aren't many that are willing to allow your children to be in and amongst you. Which brings to question... why not? Now obviously we didn't get as many chances to 'dig deep' but maybe we should be having our children watching us meet with people over the Bible more often? Just a thought...

K&K are still really fussy. It took me almost 30 minuets to do a 10 question quiz yesterday. It was really frustrating!!!! Not to mention that I was sorely sleep deprived yesterday. I couldn't sleep during Abby's nap because A) Babies were up and B) I had a mountain of homework to tackle. (One of my classes is trying to kill me, I'm sure of it!)

Later though Abby must have sensed that I was dragging. I put the babies in the nursery and just laid down on the couch. She thought we were playing a 'ni night' game. So we laid on the couch, she grabbed a blanket and we watched a few 'toons' while she drew 'preeties' on her little magnet board thing (can't think of the name) She managed to do this for almost 45 minuets! Never in the history of Abby has this happened before. I'm so thankful she did this because even if I couldn't sleep I really needed that time to just lay down.

Ok I need to get back to homework :( Tom's mom is coming up today. She is going to watch the twins while Abby is at the doctor's office tomorrow with me. Hope she doesn't mind my messy house! It's really really really low on the priority list right now.

Her lion needed to lay next to K&K. We picked that up for her the other day at Hobby Lobby. Since I was unable to get her anything for VDay I thought this was perfect! It is a pretty cute Lion.

Night Time Musings

What a whirlwind of a week it has been. I'm sitting in the recliner holding Kara and avoiding more homework that feels like it is just piling up. I did manage to complete two of my quizzes tonight, one amidst Kara's crazy screams... but I have one quiz due tomorrow, an assignment from last week due Friday, a test in another class... and a few discussion topics, readings and other things to do....

Where do I find the time... I ask myself that a lot. I'm just trying to survive this crazy semester... just trying to get through it.

On another positive note... I've found one more thing to do other than my homework. Photography. It is something that I've been dabbling in for awhile and I'm so excited to be getting more involved in it. A few people have asked me to do photos for them and I'm so excited by this! You may wonder if I'm crazy for taking up 'one more thing.' But it is something I need... it is a stress reliever, it makes me happy and I really just enjoy it. In the end if I 'fail' at this I will at least gain many beautiful pictures of my girls.

So what have we been up to... We drove down to Tom's parent's place this weekend and had a wonderful time visiting. I don't believe we had been down there since Christmas! Abby loved seeing Grandma and Grandpa D and playing with them. She actually does very well down there now and while she leaves many little 'reminders' of her being there... at least she hasn't destroyed their house completely! It is always fun to go down there. It was a nice change of scenery and just felt like a mini 'vacation' (which we could all use!)

While we were at church she hurt her arm and this made having fun a little harder. We had it looked at by the doctor today when she got her stitches out and the Dr thought it was 'nursemaid's elbow' where the joint gets dislocated. This is the 4th time she has hurt her arm like this and this last time it took 24 hours for her to use it again. Poor baby. She did very well getting her stitches out though and it was quick, easy and painless. (Apparently she had taken one out already because there was only one left in when we got there...

How have K&K been? *sigh* Hard. It's just been that type of week...

I've hardly slept the last two nights. The girls are waking up constantly and I can hardly keep them asleep. On top of this at night they have had screaming fits where I can hardly calm them down. I think the Prevacid is losing it's effectiveness. After some research I learned that the form the Prevacid is in for the girls only has a short shelf life. Therefore... screaming...angry babies=new medication needed. Hopefully Tom can grab a new set for them. In a way it's a little funny... here I had started to think: "Maybe we didn't need the medications? Maybe there wasn't anything wrong with them." or "Maybe the reflux wasn't that bad and I was just tired since they were so young..."

HAH. If anyone want's to experience a TRUE reflux 'attack' come by my house at around 7pm-9pm and watch... you will never want to do it again. They scream, and scream and scream... nothing works, you can feed them ,change them , cuddle them, put them in swings, give them a bath.. nothing... works. And by the end you are so sleep deprived, so frazzled that you can hardly stand it. It's not 'crying' or 'fussing' it is Angry blood curdling screams that just grind on you... for hours.


Well I should try and look over a few more things of homework... or go to bed which sounds a lot better. I hope tonight goes better than the last!

Something I think about a lot:

Being a mother is a job that is more frustrating, more exhausting, more difficult and more rewarding than I ever dreamed it could be...

Abby's 1st Trip to the ER

1 ER visit, 2 stitches, 3 hours of our night and 4 people to hold Abby down... never doing that again? Priceless.

Because it's almost midnight and I got almost zero sleep last night with two sick babies AND there is a good chance I will be getting no sleep once again... I'm just going to give you a brief shakedown of what happened. 

My mom came over for awhile in the early afternoon. The babies were sleeping and Abby and I went outside for awhile. The companionship was nice, it can get a little lonely sometimes at home. She had to pick up my sister from Confirmation classes at 5. I gave Abby some supper, we cleaned up the house a little (she helped vacuum... sorta) Then the babies started crying... I changed them both but just couldn't get them to stop screaming. So I put Abby in the highchair, gave her a popsicle as I fed Kara or tried to feed Kara. Eventually I was having no luck with feeding her and put her in the swing in the nursery. I got Abby down from the highchair and grabbed a screaming Kiley. Abby brought me her little Bible book and I tried to read it to her but she wanted to sit in the recliner and read it.

Now I didn't see it happen but I think that Abby was either trying to put the book onto the desk near the couch or she was trying to climb on top of it. All I saw was her go headfirst down between the desk and the recliner. She was screaming and by the time I got to her there was blood running down her face. I grabbed her quick, put a rag on it (which she took off). There was so much blood I told her that it was time for a bath... so I stripped her down and put her in the tub. Annnnd then she was happy. To me the cut looked pretty deep, I called my mom and then after Tom saw it we decided to take her in. (Tom wanted me to put in that he sprained his toe coming in to see Abby's cut.... I'm not kidding... lol) 

I called the on call nurse and talked to her for a bit. We had just been planning to take her into Acute Care but the nurse said that because it involved Abby's face we needed to take her into the ER. Abby was running around the house laughing (and running into things) The nurse was like "is that her laughing?" Yeah she's pretty tough when it comes to ouchies. She got blood on the recliner so I told Tom to keep her occupied (and from running into things). He drove her around the house in circles while I finished talking to the nurse. 

My mom and my sister came to watch the babies... Abby was very sad that we were leaving them at our house. The ER people were very nice and Abs chatted up the ladies at the front desk as we got checked in. Abby is 25lbs now by the way. The wait was a little long... but it is the ER and I was just glad it didn't take any longer! The CNP (nurse practitioner) said that they would need to do 2 stitches on Abby's bottom lip because the cut went down beyond the fleshy lip bit and could leave a nasty scar. This was what it looked like:

 It was quite the ordeal waiting in that little room with Abby for an hour. She did have a good time writing on the marker board that says : Hello, your nurse is: "name" She left them many "preeties"

They first had us try and put some numbing medication on her lip via gauze... oh she didn't like that one bit. We wrestled her for a bit and gave up. When they came in to do the stitches with one nurse and the doctor I knew they were going to need more people. They swaddled her up tight and tried to hold her down to put more numbing medication to keep it from hurting. She was so strong that nurse Todd had to go find other people to help hold her still. Poor baby I just wanted to scoop her up into my arms and hold her. They had to stop twice because she was gagging she was screaming and trying so hard to move. She kept saying "moommy" And all I could do was tell her that it was going to be ok, that we were going to fix her owwie. Longest 2 stitches ever....

The CNP did a great job, she was quick and fast and gentle with Abby. Much braver than I would have been stitching up a toddler like that! Abby sobbed on my shoulder for awhile and held me good and tight. The saddest part of it all I think is when she very gently and sadly said "please" meaning "Please can we go now?" :( I could have cried. Somehow I managed not to cry and not to pass out. Thankfully! 

But we got Abby home, she played with my sister a bit, gave her a bottle and some motrin and cuddled her into bed. We go back in 5 days to get the stitches taken out. I need to apply sunblock to the area as much as I can to try and keep it from scarring. The hardest part I think will be trying to keep her from picking at the stitches... I'm sure they will drive her a little nuts. 

Ok ... I really need sleep. It's been a loooong day.

"Awww I love you mommy"

Sick babies... I know... it's awful. Kiley and Kara as of 10:30 tonight are running temps around 100-101 degrees. There noses are running and they have a little cough. The temp isn't too bad, but the poor things are miserable. They are making soft squeaky noises to each other. At least for the moment they aren't coughing or trying to breathe. I have a feeling that if they are like this in the morning I'm taking them in to get checked out. There have been too many cases of RSV around my neighborhood for me to feel ok with just leaving it alone. In fact 3 of the neighborhood little ones are sick in the hospital with it! I just hope they sleep some tonight so that I'm not completely miserable too.

I should have known something was up, they were just crying and crying and crying and crying. I have to interrupt this paragraph because Kara fell asleep in my arms and just now woke up to smile at me, coo and all of this with her eyes mostly shut. If she weren't so miserable it would be amazingly adorable. Ok she fell back asleep.... We eventually drove down to my moms after Abby got up from her nap because I couldn't take care of them all. K&K each wanted to be held because they were miserable but Abby wanted to play... Abby looked up at me from her snack and said "Mom? Babies cry..."

I decided we had had enough. Thankfully things went better at my moms with more hands to hold babies and we even got a nice beef stew meal. I brought our dog Feebee to play down there... and forgot in all of the commotion of getting the kids into the car. I dropped off my sister for pep band so that my mom wouldn't need to go. Oh wow was Abs mad when she left!!!

My sister had been playing tea party and kitchen with Abby and wow did she just love that! We even brought a few kitchen things to play with home so that she could do that. Tom played food with her for awhile and gave her a bath tonight. It was sweet of him to do that so that I could tend to babies that would not stop crying. Lately Abby has been taking 3 hour long naps... perhaps she is growing too? All I can say is that it has given me a little more time to recover and recuperate. Abs and I made frozen cookies today, she liked putting them onto the pan until she decided the cookies looked better to eat than to play with.

Granted if I had made the dough I might have let her eat a snatch or too... but there have been recent salmonilla outbreaks from frozen cookie dough. Do I really need more sick kids? Hmmm no. We got the cookies made but didn't even get to eat any before we went to my parent's house. I guess that leaves more cookies for tomorrow!

But the really exciting thing today???

Abby told me she loved me for the first time!!! I mean actual words! I was hugging her this morning as we were walking to the nursery to change her diaper and I said "Awwww I love you Abby." And she hugged me back and said "Awww I love you mommy..." I was sooooo excited! Hearing her tell me that she loved me was one of the coolest things ever. It is a moment I will always cherish and hold on to... especially as those teen years loom maliciously in the distant future....

I feel like there was something else I had wanted to add... but that is all I can think of for now!
Goodnight :o) Hoping I get some sleep....

A Valentine Baptism

Kiley and Kara were baptized this morning. The service was wonderful and I was so happy that the weather at least allowed us to get to the church! I am thankful for all of our family that braved the elements to make their day so special. It was a beautiful service. Our pastor's wife gave birth to a beautiful baby boy yesterday and I was so pleased that he (our pastor) took the time to come back and do the baptism for us. It really meant a lot. He has been such a blessing in our lives, our whole church family has.

Tom's mom made pork sandwiches for a meal after the baptism. It was absolutely delicious. My family has been so gracious about helping us put together the meals and cleaning up afterwards. Things would have been a lot more difficult without them! Others brought deserts, vegetables, chips, silverware...etc. Thanks!

For Kiley and Kara's sake (when they get older) I'm going to list here what they received from the baptism as of today. (Please don't feel like you need to give us anything, I just want them to know later what was given)

2 Kid's Bible song cd's, a purple sweatshirt (18m), blue sweatshirt (18m), 2 teddy bears, 2 Tweety bowls, 4 pairs of socks, 2 picture frames and money that will be put into their savings accounts.

At the baptism they showed the video testimony that I had made earlier. I had several people thank me for sharing it with them and several others who said they couldn't help but cry. It was just a special way to show people the journey God led us on... sometimes it's hard to believe that part of the journey is finished. Time flies by so fast.

This is one of the baby hats that Tom's mom made for me! Beautiful! She made another floppy had that is so cute too. I wish I were that talented! Then again... I would probably make millions of them and our house would be taken over by them. I just think they look so cute on my girls!

Abby had a fantastic time playing with her cousin. We'll call him "Chip" in this blog. Tom was calling him that earlier today because he loved Pringles. They played together so well. I wish that his family lived closer, it would be nice to let them see each other more. He is turning 2 in March and we will have to go celebrate his birthday! What fun that will be.... we can't wait. Chip absolutely loved holding the twins. His mom tried to pull one of the girl's away because she was crying and oh was he upset!! It was really cute how much he loved them.

K&K are sleeping now and I'm a little sleep deprived with the crazy night that I had last night with the girls. Please God let them sleep tonight... I'm just so tired.... So for now... I think I'll call it a night.

(Had to include one in their with Abby, poor thing was exhausted by the time we were done today!)

It was the best of days, It was the worst of days... or just another day with twins

Zero signs of the girls going to sleep outside their angry cries. I KNOW this means that they are tired and want to go to sleep but so far they are resisting the urge of shutting their eyes. I'm not sure if they want to be nursed to sleep and are punishing me for not? (I gave the Prevacid a little late and they can't eat for 30 minuets) So... really it's no one's fault but my own.

I'm just tired today... tired tired tired tired. Getting up at 5am after going to bed at 12am, up at 3, 4, and 5 then out of bed at 5:30. (I remembered I had a homework assignment to do that was a lot of work) AND the best part is my professor DELAYED the time it is due until tomorrow... but added more stipulations to the assignment. So now I'm faced with the dilemma of... do I... after working on it from 5:30am-9:00am this morning... do it over again because of a few details that might be missed. Honestly- I hate the class, I hate the professor's inability to be organized and I could care less. The old responsible perfectionist me says "How dare you even think like that?! Do it again!" But I'm tired.

*sigh* I can't even win a battle with myself.

Abby was clingy today. We went to my brother's college track meet this afternoon. It was fun to go see him run in an event like that (Wow they are all sticks-nothing but skin and bone). I thought MAYBE the twins would have a hard time with the commotion and activity and gun shots. Noooo Abby did. She just couldn't handle it. Anytime I was even remotely out of sight she freaked out. There were several points where I had Kiley in the Beco and Abby hanging off of my hip. She refused even to have my sister, dad or mom hold her much. Now if you know Abs... this is very atypical. Even my mom commented on it. Eventually I put her in the Beco (yes it can hold her.) I tried to wear her on my back but she wanted me to hold her. So I put her in front where she could wrap her arms around me. I'm sure I looked like quite the spectacle to these college kids. Two babies nearby and a toddler hanging off of me in a carrier...

We decided to go home.

Abs had a kids meal  from Hardees and drank more punch than ate food despite my best efforts otherwise. I had fed Kiley and Kara before we ate there but they both proceeded to scream most of the way home. I was also trying to keep Abby awake because she was now sleepy. It was one of the longest one hour drives ever. Talk about distractions. Part of me was preparing the speech I would give the cop if I got pulled over for speeding..... yeah probably not the best thing...

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Ok I'll try to post more positively from here on. Tom bought me a new camera for V-Day. Though I have a suspicion he would have gotten it for me even if this Sunday wasn't V-Day. I am so in love with it... it takes amazing pictures and I have so much fun. The price was a little high (though great for this caliber of camera.) There is a special printer I'm hoping Tom can sell so that we can get back a little money. But... it is worth it. I will use it and use it and use it. Look at the beautiful images I was able to capture because of it!

I just picked up Kara to try and nurse her to sleep. She took a drink and now she is staring up at me and just smiling away. It is one of those moments that just steals your heart... and at the same time is immensely frustrating. You goof! Go to sleep! Kiley is fussing next door (in the bassinet) because she is jealous. Jealous? Yes jealous. This happens frequently. One is held, the other wants to be held. If they are both in the nursery they are fine, the moment I take one of them out the other is fussing. Of course this could be the works of the mysterious twin bond. I guess we'll never know...

I love my girls...